Dealing with Disappointment

For the majority of my life, if I have set my mind to something, I have been able to accomplish it. I can be very self-motivated and this has always served me well...until about 3 years ago. From the time Levi was born, I've struggled with accomplishing everything I want (I can almost hear every mom saying "Amen Sister" as I type this - you know what I mean!). Since the difference between expectation and performance is frustration, you can imagine that my life has had a little frustration the past few years. (Side Note: I am in no way implying that I wish I didn't have kids - please know this!)

The biggest area I have struggled in the past 3 years has been my exercise schedule. When I went to Auburn, I became very motivated to get in shape. As a college student and then as a "Young Married w/o Kids", I had plenty of time to hit the gym or the pavement and I loved it! Exercise has always been a huge stress reliever for me and also something I truly enjoyed.

I was doing step aerobics at 39 weeks pregnant with Levi - it was great! Then, he was born. Hmmm....didn't know that was going to happen to my body. I had a slow start getting back to the gym after Levi was born. It took probably a full year to get back to my pre-children routine. I wasn't too worried when I got pregnant with Kara 3 months later, because I had worked out last pregnancy, no problems. Well, Kara was a handful even in the womb and kept me out of the gym with all-day sickness, severe sciatica pain and a mis-aligned pelvic bone requiring weeks of physical therapy. (Not gym-friendly conditions) Then, Kara was born and here I am 8.5 months later.

For 3 years, I have been trying to do a sprint triathlon. I finally got serious about it a few months ago and started a training program. Things went great for 5 weeks - I knew that this was going to be the year! Then, I lost a week when Garet's Granddaddy died. Then, Garet went out of town for 2 weeks and I just couldn't get in my 5-day-a-week workouts. I realized this week that I will have to give up 3 more weeks of training this summer as well and that's when I had to throw in the towel for this year's race.

It's been very frustrating and disappointing. I kept thinking I could hang in there and keep training, but I know that I wouldn't be ready and I want to be in decent shape if I'm going to actually finish. I hate always saying, "Maybe next year", but that is what I'm going to have to do for now. I know that things will be better in a few months when the kids are a little older. I'll finally be able to leave Kara at the gym nursery and school will be back in session, so that will give me some extra time. Until then, I'll cherish these days with the kids and as my dad always said: "Life is about bouncing back". I can't wallow in self-pity forever! After all, there is always next year...

Wordless Wednesday

This picture can only mean one thing:

Levi is potty trained!!! The "board" is now Levi's drawing board. I seriously can not believe that I am just now blogging about it - I'm behind. Except for one accident, Levi has been in "big boy underwear" for 2 weeks now. His dresser drawer looks so different now:
I haven't been brave enough to let him wear underwear through the night yet, but we are close (that is why you see the overnight pull-ups in the picture). The other night, he got up in the middle of the night to go and he is dry most mornings. I just value my sleep to much to have to change the sheets if I need to.

I've decided that we got by the whole potty training thing pretty easy. Several people told me to just wait until they are ready and that is what we did. Therefore, we started a little later than most other people (2.5 years), but it only took 2 and a half months, so I'm not complaining! I guess Levi was ready! This couldn't have come at a better time, because with Kara now on formula ($$), it is nice to only have to pay for one set of diapers ($$)!

In other milestone news, Kara is cutting her first tooth! Levi didn't get his first until he was 11.5 months old, so I wasn't expecting one this early (which I realize is late for most babies). She's had a rough week trying to get this tooth through her gums, but it is FINALLY starting to poke on through. There was no drama when Levi got his teeth, so this is a brand new thing for me. Kara even got that "teething fever" so many people have talked about. We love her "spirited" personality though and are so thankful that "Baby Koko" (Levi's term of endearment for her) is in our family. I also love the way she sleeps...with her little bottom up in the air. I couldn't resist a picture!

Fields & Fireworks

This year, Garet decided that we needed to support Jim & Family and buy some fireworks. This year, Levi decided that he does NOT like fireworks. Sorry, Jim.

The Fields came over to grill out (and help some on the playground). The night started out innocently enough with sparklers (I wonder what Garet is thinking):

Then, we lit this thing:

It is a monster truck and it turned after we lit it and it came straight towards Levi. This did not make him happy. He spent the remainder of the evening under a blanket while I watched Garet light the rest of the fireworks through the window. I think he will be fine next year - poor guy.

In all fairness to him, our neighborhood put on quite a show this year and it was very loud. Some of them made me jump they were so loud. Anyway, we hope all of you had a wonderful holiday. I don't know if I can wait until September for the next one!

We never waste a holiday!

To say that we don't waste a holiday is an understatement. For example, here is our 2008 holiday schedule so far:

Martin Luther King Day: Begin flooring project (I still need to do an update on that since we finally finished!)

President's Day: Travel to Maryland to visit my brother and his wife

Spring Break: Travel to Detroit to visit Garet's sister and family

Memorial Day: My 30th birthday trip to San Antonio.

As you can see, our holiday's involve either Travel or Home Improvements. So, what did the Fields do for the 4th??

Ta da:


Garet is fresh off his trip, so we didn't want to go anywhere and we had been talking about getting a playground for some time now. We finally bit the bullet and dove in. Everyone had warned us about the extremely tedious and long process these playgrounds take to put together, but, I have to admit that Garet and I have really enjoyed it. I got to sort all the pieces (which is how my mind is wired for enjoyment) and Garet got to be outside and build things with power tools. It was a win-win for both of us. Plus, we got to spend time together and I can hold my own with a drill now!

Here we are just getting started - you would not believe the amount of hardware:

Levi helping Garet with Step 1 (of 36 steps):

While the playground is rated for ages 3-11, Levi had no problems scaling every last inch of it. I think we have a winner!
The Finished Product. This is the Sunray Playground from Costco (where else?):
Side note: We did have to drive to the Costco in Nashville because our Costco sold all theirs and wasn't getting anymore in. I'll post our 4th of July pictures in another post.

I survived

I haven't blogged in over a week - yikes - I miss my therapy! Truth be told, Garet was out of town for 11 days straight...all the way to sunny Hawaii (ugh!). Being a single parent of a baby and a toddler is not easy and it reminded me to be thankful daily to have Garet as a help-mate. I didn't get a lot accomplished over that week and a half and now I'm paying the price! That time also challenged me to be more of a servant to single moms I know - I don't know how they do it - they really are super women!

Anyway, Garet finally got home on Sunday, but on Friday, I took the kids up (rather I rode with Garet's family) up to Nashville and then onto Lexington, KY for the annual Hurter Family Reunion at the farm. Always lots of fun, good food and a very hot hay ride. It was a challenge to take on a road trip with the two kids minus Garet, but we survived (with A LOT of help from Nana, Granddaddy, Aunts, Uncles and Cousins - Thank you!!). Thursday night after I was done packing, Garet calls to tell me that maybe I should just stay home and play it safe. Needless to say, I didn't back down and we had a great time. The kids were fabulous. I've said it before, but the Lord really does give me extra grace when Garet is out of town.

All the cousins in their matching outfits at the farm:

I never got a good one of Levi & Kara, but this made me laugh - it is SO them:

The "Girls":

The "Boys":

Our "attempt" to get a picture of the youngest generation of Hurters:

I honestly thought the hayride this year was never going to end - a memory for the kids none the less:

War Eagle Fly Down (to) the Field(s)

We had the best time on Monday Night! Our friends, Dan, Ellen & Davis invited us to go "downtown" for the weekly Concert in the "Park". I've lived here 8 years and never been - sad - because it was fabulous! The kids needed a break from the house and this was the perfect opportunity. The band played Garet's favorite - Johnny Cash - I just can't get away from his music! Entertaining, none the less.

Dan & Ellen (with our kids, not theirs!):

Enjoying the beautiful weather & music: There's Davis (with the band in the background):

Dan & Ellen recently returned from living overseas and I was thrilled when they said they were moving right around the corner from us. I'll tell you why I love having Dan & Ellen nearby - it makes me feel like a college kid again (and it doesn't hurt that they are fun to hang out with as well)! Sure Garet and I have been married 8 years, have 2 kids and are official adults, but there is just something comforting about having people (mainly Dan) who knew us back in the day. My years at Auburn were some of the best years of my life - so much fun with friends, things to do and living on my own! I wouldn't trade those years for anything! War Eagle!

Now, I just need to work on getting everyone else up here so that I can feel young forever. I sure do miss these guys (and more not pictured!) - thankfully, I get to live with one of them!

This post is not about animals

I hate animals...I really do. I think they are dirty and gross and I don't want them to touch me, ever. If you have very large dogs in your house, I probably won't come over - seriously, they scare me! Having said that, I am currently attached to two sets of animals. First, we got these fish for Levi about a year ago (this was all Garet's doing). We thought he would love them and Levi could care less. The only person that has enjoyed them is Kimberly's son, Noah.

We ran out of food for the fish last week and so Garet asked me if he should just kill them quick or let them struggle to live in the ditch water behind our house. What?!?! I just couldn't even comprehend the thought. What did I do? I went and bought more food. I hate these fish.

Second, a bird started building a nest on our porch. A few weeks later, we noticed that there were baby birds in the nest. Levi has been fascinated by them - we look out the window at the birds several times a day. I have to admit it is about one of the cutest things I've ever seen...until a few days ago. We realized not all of the baby birds were moving. The best I can tell, two of the babies have died. I haven't seen the mother bird in a few days now and I really hope the other two are getting the food they need. I hate this feeling.

Normally, the above events wouldn't bother me that much. However, this has not been an ordinary week. Last week, a friend of mine delivered her baby girl with the knowledge that the baby would not live. She found out at her ultrasound a few months back that their baby had anencephaly. I had never heard of anencephaly before and I really wish I never had. She chose to carry the baby to full term - not a choice most make, unfortunately. I can not even fathom feeling her little girl move only to know what was ahead. An amazing mother, indeed.

I've been a bad friend in this case. We had our first child within two weeks of each other and spent so much time during our pregnancies comparing this, that and the other and it was nice to have someone to talk to that was going through the same thing I was going through. Our second pregnancies ended up being completely different - I struggle with why I was given a healthy baby and she was not. I've avoided the situation (partly due to our proximity this time) because I quite honestly could not handle it. The situation is not fair - it really, really isn't fair - but, I have to choose (several times a day) to believe that God knows something I don't. And, He knows a lot of things I don't.

So, if each of you would stop right now and pray - really say a prayer, not just a passing thought - for my friend and her husband and daughter, it would mean a lot to me. As far as I know, the baby is still living at this time. Then, go give your family another hug.

I'll leave you with the words from a song we sang at church on Sunday:
You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name